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  • Lily Lawson

The books that stay in my head

Updated: 13 hours ago

I have read a lot of books in my life and some of them hold no memory. Yet some of them, years later, I can still recall some of the details, fragments or sometimes the whole premise. If you are an author, this is what you are aiming for, the hope your book will be read more than once or that the first impression your book makes lives on in the mind of the reader. That they will recommend it to anyone that asks and even those that don't. Some authors will be forever associated with one book, some for the vast range of their work. Some authors will be torn to shreds, some hailed as heroes and some will be forgotten their books assigned to dusty shelves or heaped in boxes sold in bulk. As writers we reach for the stars, many have said they wish they had written Harry Potter. I devoured the whole series in succession one summer waiting for the last book to come out and then devoured that. However, I do not share the wish that I had wrote them.

These are the books I remember

Split skirt - Agnes Rossi

Dice man - Luke Rhinehart

Rachels holiday - Marian Keyes

Running the risk - Christina Jones

Tell Mrs Poole I'm sorry - Kathleen Rowntree

Yes Man - Danny Wallace

Hotel World - Ali Smith

Lucky Bones - Alice Sebold

Freaky Friday - Mary Rodgers

P.S. I love you - Cecelia Ahern

I'll take Manhattan - Judith Krantz

Some other rainbow - John McCarthy and Jill Morrell

The time traveller's wife - Audrey Neffinger

Life's little instruction book - H Jackson Brown Jnr

Airs and Graces- Erica James

The luxury of time - Jane Tomlinson

Mum's list - St John (Singe) Greene

The to do list - Mike Gayle

One day - David NIcholls

these are the ones from the past year or so

Haven Wakes - Fi Phillips

Beyond - Georgia Springate

Across the line - Sophie A Monroe

If you check through the list you will see they are all carry a uniqueness, at least I think so. I like unique, in people, in music, in books, in life.

The bravery in writing, the reason we do it is to share a little of who we are, to speak to those who would never hear us otherwise, to make a difference. I may write under a pen name, but it wasn't a wish to hide and not own my voice. It was a wish to free it. The reality of our history is it cannot be erased. I reinvented myself to close the door on who I used to be, within my writing, in the hope of being taken seriously. I felt my history would hold me back from that, if only in my own mind.

Lily Lawson is no character, she is me, a real person, probably more so than I ever was. I use my real name as a student, a carer, with my family and interchangeably with my friends. I am often amused by the backwards and forwards shift in my identity. I can only put me on the page if me has another name that allows the full expression of who I am. I have been judged and found wanting, like so many of us are. As Lily Lawson I can say that happened to someone else, that person exists and continues to live in me, but she is silenced in my writing because that way I can believe in myself, in what I have to say.